On a London hopper bus the other day, it was certainly a
pleasure to get in out of the cold, wet and windy U.K winter weather. I took my
seat just behind the screen near the exit door (I use it as a draft blocker for
those in the know) and snuggled down for my ride back to the Shires.
There was another bus in front of our hopper which was
waiting for the traffic lights to switch and let us out of the bus station, out
onto the road, but we were still stationary at the bus stop when a tapping was
heard. We (the handful of approx. 10 passengers that had entered and the bus
driver) all looked over to the door, to see a woman with a buggy standing there
in the pouring rain.
To my surprise the bus driver turned his head back to the
front window and did nothing. We waited for a while, during which time the
woman continued knocking… awaiting some form of response from the driver. There
I have to ask myself on many occasions am I too nosy, too
into people’s business, why should this bother me if it bothers no one else on
the bus? But I couldn’t keep quiet…
“Hi, Excuse me there’s a woman and a baby
at the door” I stated… just in case he hadn’t noticed. At this point the driver
turned around to me and began to stare at me like my old school principle - the
look that says “Sit your a-- down, and don’t say nu-en else”. Maybe
my petite frame and good genes fooled him into believing I was a school girl he
could intimidate, but it’s been some time since my school days and I really
didn’t appreciate that look.
you not come from a woman” I asked, “and were you not a child at some time?
Would you like your wife and child to be left out in that cold and windy rain
He retorted something about not being able to open up the doors for
everyone or he would never leave. “I understand driver but we can’t go anywhere
at the moment anyway, and we are still at the bus stop technically”. He was not
trying to hear that at all and turned his back to me.
It was at that point I
used the emergency button to open the exit door.
With one foot on the bus and one foot on the pavement I beckoned for the
woman to come along out of the rain. By now, as it was time for the school run,
there was another woman also with a baby in a buggy wanting to get on, and they
The first woman had a few choice words for the driver
and the other was happily thawing out in her seat. Everyone happy yeah? – Uhhhmmm... No! The driver threw his hands up in the air, switched the engine off, and the whole bus
“I no driving anywhere, you
don’t open my door, is my door, IS MY DOOR!” he shouted at me, eyes now glaring as wide as an Aye- aye's from behind his little cabin window. "You get out, NOW you get out!"
...Well, I can’t quite remember exactly what I said at that point…
something along the lines of - No! This is Transport for London's bus, not yours, without passengers - there is no need for your job
and about not letting a “position” get to his head etc. except with a mild Jamaican
twang that really does work wonders… The engine and lights were swiftly
switched back on, the doors opened wide for a further 5 people (some thanking me) to also board the bus back to the Shires. And off we
It occurred to me on the peaceful drive back to the Shires
that this society rears the male to have certain views of women that do not
promote a wholesome and realistic view of real women. They tend to have to fall
into one of these categories: Sex symbols, house slave, a weaker/lesser version
of a man that needs to be treated mean to be kept keen, or if she dares enter
the world of business, women are still labelled as “hard bitches” if she stands
her ground and takes no nonsense. Yet I’ve never heard the term “hard bastard”
used when describing a savvy business man.
I was shocked at the disregard this
man showed a baby and a woman in such weather, where was the reverence for the
future and their carers. How could she and women in general, bloom happily to
raise fully functioning, healthy and happy children if that is how the men of
the society viewed and treated her and others?
I found myself going down the “how selfish men are” line of
thought, when a situation took my attention off of that.
The second woman who
had bought her buggy on had it turned vertically across two spaces, totally the
opposite of the other two buggies which had assumed the correct position to be
able to house four buggies instead of three. This meant that further along in
the journey, another mother (probably also on the school run) was unable to get
on the bus and had to wait in that awful weather for the next bus in 15 minutes
After I just show you bout consideration a this you come do? I had to bring her out of her single minded
Barbie girl world for a minute. “Baby girl,” she took her face out of her phone
for a second and looked around. “That lady and her child just got left behind
because you are taking up two spaces, you were glad to get on when I opened the
door for you, why wouldn’t you consider someone else the same way?” She giggled
nervously and shrugged her shoulders. I realised then that she was just totally
oblivious to everything outside of her I-phone. I get it… the I/ME culture. I had
to admit in my head, that we women can be just as selfish as men, knowingly or
A possible Knock on effect – Woman getting colder, wetter and more desperate to get
to that last child/children waiting somewhere in a cold, dark and grey
playground as all their friends wave goodbye, looking out worriedly for their
mum’s arrival and all in freezing, wet weather. I have been that parent and that child. The ripple effect is real.
BTW, two of the original passengers who were getting off at
different stops quietly nudged me on their way out and said “Good on yah for
that” and “Yes, yes, you right, you do good”.
I nodded and said take care.
We were all on the bus, we all saw her and the baby standing in the rain… and yet I
don’t know if it be some unspoken English law of keeping a stiff upper lip,
cold composure and the order to “Just carry on”, that prevented anyone from
saying a word then or when the driver was telling me to get off the bus - but I
do continue to find these things funny in a non-humorous way where ever I spot
it. Just turn a blind eye for a quiet life. Punkship.
Is it possible that we have come to the point in humanity where
we are so blinded by the illusion of man made status, money and gadgets that we no
longer see each other?
Many of us are able to see people for whom and what they are
and value people, their spirits, skills, uniqueness and experiences as such.
Then, there are those of us that only see what you have, who you know, what you
can do for them, or how they can get to manipulate you. If you provide none of
the latter opportunities… than you will be deemed unworthy/ not of use. “Computer
I long for the good old days when commonly: men would give
up a seat to a pregnant woman or an elderly person.
When men were already
enough within themselves not to have to be in unspoken, macho competition with
each other or their women. When elder
women taught younger women instead of hating them for their youth and vitality.
When young women could revere older women due to their wisdom and a common love and
appreciation, instead of what I see commonly now- a- days… blinkers fully on,
and relationships of all kinds on sale to the highest bidders.
is lovely, but not if we forget or let go of those things which were once the
very basics of a well oiled standard of manners and consideration that kept social
wheels turning smoothly.
I did not speak from the point of view that I think I am
superior or “can do better than you”, my line of thought is, if I have
discovered an easier or more beneficial way of doing something, I am sharing it
with you. Tone of voice and suggestions of remedy should show that there is no
animosity. Offence needn’t be taken, for it is collaboration and the sharing of
ideas that has brought and continues to take human kind into the future. It is
your choice to see if it is beneficial to you and others around you. In this case the driver listened, saw my point and many benefited as a result.
would and do appreciate the same input from my fellow humans being… in a language that
I can overstand.
Be aware that not all beings are here to be used or abused,
nor is everyone here to use and abuse others as Annie Lennox may have you
believe… although, I am fully aware that these people do exist, (great song
btw) however, there are those of us who are here to live our own lives in our
own rights, who wish harmony to all around us and to be a part of a beautifully
working, woven fabric of society.
While we may not always be able to afford the luxury of
being aware of our surroundings, people around us and how our actions may or
may not impact their lives, let us at least be aware of staying within our own
personal spaces. I.E
The car that holds up the lane next to them because unnoticed to them, they have driven over their lane line, oblivious to the traffic piling up
behind because their business of texting is far more important than anybody
else’s business at that moment. Sometimes
it’s not all about us, me or I. More than ever is a time that is about all of
us together, and how we can all respectfully fit in… together, bridging gaps to complete the
full picture that is harmonious earthly living.
If you can not find true harmony in your own life, at least have
the decency not to get in the way of others who do or are on their personal
quest, whether you deem it worthy or not.
If you can not or will not be of help to others, at least… don’t be a
Till next time... One Love Peeps, The Purple Kayz